And we reminded ourselves--via some Robert Andrews' The Family and dreaming about the future--of the bigger picture.
Without a doubt, I don't want my children to fight with each other. Neither do I want them to yell at me, or get off their beds at naptime, or throw their broccoli on the floor, or be stingy with their belongings--not that any of these things ever happen in our house, of course.
My children need to respect and fear Daniel and I as authorities, but not just so that we aren't afraid to take them out in public or so that life here in the home is peaceful. The serenity and joy that comes with obedience to me, as Mom, is not the goal, but a by-product. There is something much greater than wanting polite and kindchildren that needs to be the motivation and continual focus of our
child-training.
Really, they need to understand authority so that they will eventually respond to His authority.
Then we talked about discipline--about how to make sure we are making the most of correction moments to teach; and about the challenges of molding character without destroying our children. Like wild stallions, Gabriel and Bronwyn (and, before I know it, Jack) need to be broken, but not to the point that they won't run. Oh!--never that, Lord! I want them to run, and I want them to run hard and far.
But I want them to run for the Master.
We talked about these things, we were overwhelmed by these things, and we prayed about these things and for our children. It's too much for us, but it's not too much for Him.
I really believe you and Daniel are being great parents to your kids. It warms my heart.
ReplyDeleteThis seems like a similar theme to what I posted this morning. Interesting. Good stuff. So blessed to see that you are such loving and interested parents. You guys are terrific and I love you both.
ReplyDeleteYeah it is sometimes hard to know what to do when, I think. My mother likes to go, "Ohhhh," as if we are killing our children, if we say anything in even the slightest mean tone. It is frustrating. If my mom is doing that, then who else might do that to me? Then watch someone calls Child Protective Services. Anyways. Friday sounds good. If anything happens that it needs to be changed I will let you know. We think Keith will have no problem getting home by 4. What time do you want to shoot for then? GTG eat.
ReplyDeleteAndrea
We have been having similar conversations around this house! In fact, we are currently in the middle of what we fondly call "baby boot camp".
ReplyDeleteSunday sounds great! I'll probably just put my guys down to nap at your house. Let me know what I can bring!
I may also need to escape over there one of these days. Ryan needs to stain a few doors. THe kids really shouldn't be here smelling the fumes of the stain. I'll let you know when he's doing that stuff!
Joe and I had a similar conversation the night before last... It seems "life" is just determined to run away with us and though we know how deliberate we must be in order to accomplish our goals, they so often escape us and we find that another week or month has past without implementing ideas and plans...
ReplyDeleteI tend to want to just radically change and get everything "right". I know more gentle and consistent growth is the best order... but for pete's sake, that takes like... character or something!
It seems we're all having the same conversations. It's great to know that we are all talking about the same things. Tim and I just last week had a very similar conversation.
ReplyDeleteI feel like in some ways I've already missed the window of opportunity, but then I realize that is just my own way of continually putting off the NOW. I'd rather wallow in the past opportunities that I feel I've missed then address the NOW. Much easier that way...We'll be praying for you and Daniel and all the other couples as we enter our child rearing days ahead.
Great book- I read the sample pages on Amazon and I plan to order the book soon. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteOk again, it sounds good! I will let Keith know the time so he will be here on time. If that is alright we use the highchair, that would be great. Gtg but we will see you around the time you said, maybe a little earlier.
ReplyDeleteAnDi
Thank you for your encouragement. The quiet really does open the up real person behind the masquerade.
ReplyDeleteWhat are you days looking like in the upcoming weeks?
We have that conversation often. We want to make sure that we are raising a child who loves JESUS. Stephen and I have both been hurt deeply by authorities in our lives and we want to make sure that,like you said,we train our child to run after JESUS. It is hard because we want to let our son be who God designed him to be and NOT what others think he should be. It is hard to know when to do what, but we have had lots of comments from people about how good he is, so I guess we are doing a good job. Growing up I was not aloud to express my feeling and thoughts so I shut down and that hurt who I was. Praise God he has given me a husband who lets me express those feelings. He then tries to help me through the problem. That is what we need to do with our children. Thank you for the insight!
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