2 Months

Aubrey is constantly changing. That is the way of newborns, isn't it?

She "talks" now-- especially when I talk to her-- and her little voice is breathtakingly adorable. While I spend ridiculous amounts of time trying to coax a reluctant smile out of her, she would rather knit her brows together and tell me of her day, it seems.

She doesn't like taking baths, but then, none of my infants have. I don't like her cries as I bathe and dress her, but I sure do love the sweet scent of a freshly washed and lotion'd baby in my arms.

She is asleep most evenings by 6 or 7pm and she spends the rest of the night sleeping very well and having to be woken for almost all of her every-3-hours feedings. Her good nighttime sleeping patterns make it so I dare not complain about her poor daytime sleeping patterns.

She will see the cardiologist tomorrow and be weighed there. Last week she weighed 8lbs,4oz. Looking at her chubby cheeks, I can confidently say that she has gained weight throughout the past several days, though I've given up on trying to guess exactly how much.

This past Thursday she was 8 weeks old and I decided it was high time she start wearing size 1 diapers since newborn diapers are more expensive. My reward was her first two "explosions" resulting from diapers that are too big around her skinny legs and tiny waist. Oh well.

She is much more content this past week than she had been. I'm still not sure what exactly has helped with this, since her medication was lowered, I cut dairy out of my diet, we changed bottles, and I stopped drinking my morning cup of decaf coffee all within about 48 hours. Right now, I don't care what it is that's helping-- I'm just happy she's happier!

Her heart still thumps beneath her chest. Her biggest brother notices her unusual breathing and comments on it. She has her daily medications and frequent bottles of expressed milk. We can't let her sleep too long or cry too much. She has at least weekly medical appointments. She is different than my other babies were in many, many ways.

But God is God of her, just as He is of them. And perhaps it is good that this mother's prayers have become a bit more fervent than they were in the past-- not just on Aubrey's behalf, but also on Gabriel's and Bronwyn's and Jackson's.

Most of all, we deeply love our littlest girl. She amazes us over and over again. There are countless times in a day when Daniel or I, awed as we gaze at her, say to one another, "Can you believe how miraculously God has spared her?" We don't deserve this-- our faith has often failed us and our need of goodness is without question-- and so Aubrey reveals to me with every snuggle and coo the abundant grace and gifts of God in my life.