Sunday, December 18, 2005

Today as worship began, I found myself suddenly aware of how strange it
is that he hasn't come up to me yet and said, "Whoa--you've got a kid inside of you. We were, like, in kindergarten together and now you've got a kid inside
of you." I'm not sure what provoked the thought; perhaps it's
remembering two years ago when I was home for Christmas, pregnant then,
as well, when he said those words to me. But the emotional part of me
that knows no reason and struggles to accept reality couldn't
understand why I haven't laughed with him over this seemingly "playing
grown-up" that I'm doing.

I am so aware of his absence at times. I can't even imagine how those who shared daily life with him feel.

O Come, o come, Emmanuel...

Only You can right all this, Lord.

4 comments:

  1. Strange how we think of him at random moments. I thought of him during worship yesterday, too. I almost always do.

    And I find myself praying, O Come, O Come, Emmanuel...

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  2. I agree with your mom.  I too think of him at random moments.  We had a lot of people over playing computer games last week.  Several times during the evening I was almost expecting to see him come around the corner.  Each time I had to check the tears as I realized that I would never again see him wander into my kitchen or say "hi baby" to my little ones.  His absence leaves a gap.

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  3. Who are you talking about!!!!!!!????????

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  4. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU AND YOUR WONDERFUL FAMILY!
    -N

    ReplyDelete